Monday, July 25, 2011

Wolves Nation's Curious Head Coaching Vacancy

Kaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahn.

Now thats out of my system, Id like to discuss the precarious position the Minnesota Timberwolves find their head coaching vacancy in.

Lets stick to the basic information; The Wolves have just fired their coach of the previous two seasons, Kurt Rambis, whom over that time amassed 132 losses. Was this the right system for him? Could Rambis be productive with a more veteran roster? Was the process leading to his sacking the most ethical? - The answers to those questions are more relevant to Rambis then Wolves Nation; he was here and lost a bunch so we let him go.

Dude make us that 8th seed Warriors squad.
The current team features an All-Star and Gold Medal bearing power forward with a knack for rebounding (30 and 30, alright a bit more of a knack but lets not get too wild), has the touch from deep and an even softer one near the rim, and - noted now simply because the Spaniard is in town - the ability to concisely outlet a pass. A point guard who hasnt played a single minute of American pro ball but is enjoying a reputation that precedes himself as an open court executing fast break igniter in Ricky Rubio. He, apparently, doesn't have a jumper or care much for defense, but, whatever, Ricky SIGNED!

Id like to continue to list off young interesting players that could contribute to a fun little season, but its the same list of guys from last year, with the addition of guys with similar attributes and just as similar results; substandard. Michael Beasley, Anthony Tolliver, Anthony Randolph, Darko Milicic - all guys with noted potential that never accumulated and now just drift around basketball courts hoping for a pay check and the occasional open shot. Kev, Ricky, a bunch of rejects, and the 2nd overall pick in Derek Williams.

Young, unproven, defensively incompetent, and scattered are some of the thoughts (PG thoughts) that come to mind when considering our squad; headlined by an off-his-rocker GM.

How the eff has my Minnesota found itself on a sinking ship with a crazy GM at the hull just after getting rid of a crazy captain. I just want to float, if for just a moment again.

As ridiculously hapless as all this sounds, the list of coaches lining up for the gig is almost baffling. Rick Adelman, Don Nelson, Larry Brown. WHAT.

If Minnesota, if David Effing Kahn, can find a way to pull in one of those names we can finally take Wolves ball seriously for the first time in a long time.

The Wolves, just like any other team, have been in spots; good ones, bad ones, beginnings, ends - and they all seemed to make sense, except for this. We've got a young, apparently run and gun team, without even a whisper of success, not even a shadow of reliability, and could see a coach in the top 10 in all time wins leading the way.

Either this gets pulled off because one of these guys sees something we dont, David Kahn's history (although checkered) is deep so a connection worked out, or one of these guys are really bored and willing to take a job for the eff of it (because, to be perfectly honest, this is currently the kind of place for an old guy to hang out with some young folk and try some things just to see if they'll work out).

Whatever it is - a combination of the three or something else altogether -  we just need one of them.

Although the idea of hiring some young, inexperienced, stud-of-the-moment to show up and inspire our young core and ride with us through his and the teams collective maturity sounds enchanting and all, what are the honest odds of such a thing? Ill take the guy with the experience, and wins, to try and knock some knowledge into our (lovably) knuckle-headed wolf pack.

Or Kahn can screw it up and hire Brian Bickerstaff.

Okay, one more time.

Kaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahn

Thursday, July 7, 2011


DAMN ALL I'M TRYNA DO IS BE ON THE UP N UP

JUST HOLDIN DOWN THE CRIB NAH MEENS

BUNCHA SUPER DUPER FIENDZ COOKIE MONSTER EDITION

MY INTERPRETATION HERE IS THAT THIS DUDE HAS A REALLY LARGE CAMERA





DANG BET HE WISH HE HAD VIDEO GAMES DUMBY
YOU KNOW WHEN YOU DRINKIN A THING SO HARD ITS LIKE YOUS EATING IT DAS THE BOMBEST

REVOLUTIONARY SWAG

THE MORE AZIZ THE BESTEST NAH MEEN
















AND THEN DADDY WAS LIKE EVERYBODY PILE IN THE MINIVAN
THEY VERSION OF TAG BE THE REALEST